Gabriel and the Dire Duck

One day, you swiped too many items to carry. You had to abandon some of them. Today, the being in the black coat is at the park again. They've brought all your lost mischief back! Pick up an item: (link: "Soggy tabloid")[(set: $PrologueItem to "soggy tabloid")(goto:"Prologue 3")] (link: "Fidget spinner")[(set: $PrologueItem to "fidget spinner")(goto:"Prologue 3")] (link: "Candy wrapper")[(set: $PrologueItem to "candy wrapper")(goto:"Prologue 3")] (link: "Pocket knife")[(set: $PrologueItem to "pocket knife")(goto:"Prologue 3")] (link: "Dead rat")[(set: $PrologueItem to "dead rat")(goto:"Prologue 3")]

''//Interlude, 1827//'' // "...And in conclusssion," Crowley said with a flourish of arrows on the chalkboard, "after holding up a stagecoach, bribing six ministersss, and circumnavigating the globe to plant occult sigils at key locationsss, I have turned EVERY single goose on the planet...into a demon! Can I hear a Huzzah?" (He winced. That last part was more sarcastic than he'd intended.) "...Huzzah!! Aziraphale sounded puzzled. "Why would you think I wouldn't give you a Huzzah? That whole business with slipping actual demonic lyrics into the performance of Faust was extraordinarily masterful!" Crowley sighed and sank down on the sofa, reaching for the decanter. "Oh, not you, Angel, it's my lot. They'd never give me a Huzzah. Never have, never will." Aziraphale reached out and put a hand on his shoulder. He left it there until Crowley turned to look at him. "Huzzah," he said again. Softer and more sincerely. // [[Continue|Rampage 1]]

Wet footprints trail behind you. Eventually, your feet dry. You turn around and walk the other way. You follow the wall. A narrow staircase leads upward. [[Climb the staircase|Earth Observation 1]] [[Return to the open area|Exploring To Planet]] [[Continue along the wall|Exploring to Closet]]

You immediately find a fancy being to chase. They have many gleaming pebbles around their neck. You honk wildly. You brandish the $PrologueItem. You charge. They clutch at their pebbles. They make anger noises. They RUN at you. But a clever snake foot makes them trip. They fall on their face. Pebbles skitter and bounce across the ground. The noise is like music. [[Eat pebbles|Prologue 4]] [[honk|Prologue 4]]

You run toward the most interesting thing in sight. It is round. You remember the big black and orange sports ball you ran away with once. It was so big, you had to nudge it along ahead of you with your head. This ball is blue and green and white and immensely bigger. The beings erupt with shrill noises of panic. Excellent. That is definitely the thing to run toward. Even if it is too big to run away with. [[Peck at the ball|Planet Peck]] [[hONK!|Planet Honk]]

''Chapter 1: Grand Entrance'' Time passes. Incomprehensible feelings and smells surround you. Then...light. The holes in the box are small, but you can see clearly. More time passes. Footsteps approach. The beings say cautious noises. You crouch. Coil. This is the mayhem you were waiting for. The box opens. [[honk|Start]]

The room appears to be for storing things and yet it is just as bright as everywhere else. Immediately catching your attention is the smell of the Gray One's spilled beverage...but much stronger. [[hONK!|Supply Closet 2]]

You ignore the strange kitchen appliances and tear open a box. Plastic cups scatter across the floor. You peck at the wrapper. The contents look like dirt. They taste like exhilleration. You tear open another cup. [[hONKHONKHONK!|Supply Closet 3]]

(set: $IsMichael to 1) The gray one approaches a long table. And so do you. The gray one still hasn't noticed you. Beings are gathered around it, looking at a screen. The screen is a maze of color and writing. A frilly being presses a clicker. The bells chime again as everything on the screen shrinks and bounces away to reveal more colors and more writing. [[Yank on the gray one's scarf|Attack Gabriel Directly]] [[Steal the frilly one's bell clicker|Clicker]] [[hONK!|hONK!]]

You climb out of the mop bucket. [[Overturn it|Overturn 1]] [[hONK!|Exploring]]

Another being makes anger noises. Their dog's anger noises are louder. They unlatch the dog rope. The dog runs at you. You drop the $PrologueItem. You run. You almost collide with the snake feet. There is distant quakcing and a splash. The dog has run into the pond instead. The angry being runs after the dog. [[Peck at the snake feet|Prologue 4.5]] [[honk|Prologue 5]]

The snakes are shaped like foot-clothes. But the being in the black coat recoils. They make the pained noise of pecked toes. [[honk|Prologue 5]]

The being in the black coat crouches down. They appear to be addressing you. They have no eyes. Only two shaded mirrors. You stare into your own face twice. [[honk honk|Prologue 6]]

The being continues to address you. The noises aren't angry. The noises are kind. And tempting even. Instinct tells you that a great quantity of uncaused mayhem is very near. [[honk!|Prologue 7]]

The being opens a shipping box. Their hand invites you to climb inside. [[Waddle into the box.|Interlude 2010]] [[honnnnk honk honk honk HONK HONK??!|Prologue 7.5]]

The being breathes loudly at you. They take the mirrors off of their face. You see now that their eyes are also snakes. But you are no longer afraid. They address you with noises that are conspiratorial and yet simultaneously vulnerable. You feel safe. You feel limitless. You feel trusting. [[Waddle into the box|Interlude 2010]]

(set: $IsMichael to 0) (set: $IsEarth to 0) (set: $IsObservation to 0) (set: $IsCloset to 0) (set: $IsSegway to 0) (set: $IsKey to 0) (set: $IsMopper to 0) You don't honk. You hONK! The light is immense and everywhere. It makes noises brighter. You hONK! again. The beings who have opened the box are startled. You see several other beings in the background. They have not seen you yet. [[hONK! hONK!|Start Attack]] [[Evade and stalk|Start Lurk]]

"hONK! hONK!" You shout your bright voice. You brandish your wings. The beings' caution noises are louder. Their hands reach to defend each other. [[Hisssss|Attack 1]]

The beings allow you to waddle past. They chuckle disdainful noises. The short one says noises into a hand-screen. His teeth shine like knives. The distant ones haven't seen you yet. You select your target. They are walking away from you. Their coat is soft gray. They are wearing an extremely yankable scarf. They are carrying an entire tray of beverages in warm-cups. [[(inner honk)|Meeting 1]]

You leap and beat your wings in the face of the gray one. This does not make them spill the beverages. You grab their scarf in your beak. You pull as they aim their kick. This DOES make them spill the beverages. Dark stains soak their soft gray coat. All the beings are shouting noises of anger. You run! [[hONK!|Escape]]

You dodge all the other beings. You reach your target, the frilly one. You jump up, flapping your wings. Their frilly wrists move to protect the gold specks on their face. You miss your target and peck some frill. They drop the clicker. You catch it in your beak and flee. hONK! Bells! hONK! Bells! Several clicks later, the bells stop. You steal a look behind you, and the screen has gone dark except for a triangle in the middle, and a small, slowly spinning circle. Those not chasing you make noises of disgust. [[hONK|Passive Spill]]

Everyone at the table jumps. Alarmed noises echo all around. The gray one moves to kick. The frilly one clicks a button by mistake. More bells. This time the shapes and writing slowly grow until the entire screen is taken up by a few heavy lines, which then fade into tiny pieces to reveal the next set of things beneath. [[Yank the scarf|Attack Gabriel Directly]] [[Steal the clicker|Clicker]] [[Run|Passive Spill]]

''Chapter 2: The Crossroads'' You round a corner. And see a DOOR. It gleams brighter than the most brilliant sunset you've ever seen. The complexity of shapes and texture make your head spin. This is the mayhem you sensed. It must be. But no way in. No more time to admire. The beings are close. They will catch you soon. The only thing within reach is a mop bucket. [[Hide|Crossroads Hide]] [[Overturn|Crossroads Dodge]]

The short one pulls out a hand-screen. Their teeth shine like knives as they shout into it. One of the distant beings draws nearer. They are wearing a soft gray coat and scarf. They are carrying a tray of beverages in cups made for warm. [[Yank the scarf|Attack Gabriel Directly]] [[Steal the hand-screen|Attack 1.75]] [[Run|Passive Spill]]

Somewhere behind you there is a specific shout. You have a sense for shouts. This is the shout of a being who has spilled hot beverage onto themself. It is one of your favorite shouts. [[Keep running|Escape]]

You feint a peck at the short one. It's enough to make them scrunch their face and drop the hand screen. It does not shatter when it hits the ground. It shatters when you peck it. Bubbles erupt from the shards as if it was one of those motorized yard toys you'd stolen from a barbecue last summer. You stop to peck at the bubbles. The beings close in. The gray one aims a kick. [[Run|Passive Spill]]

(set: $IsSegway to 1) The beings shriek when you approach. They abandon their vehicles. Carefully, you step onto one and lean forward. Beneath your feet, it hums to life. And abruptly skids away from you. You pick yourself off the ground and try again. This time you lean forward more slowly. And you're off! Flames trail behind you. You approximate the Gray One's gleeful teeth baring. [[hhhONK! hhhONK!|Segway 2]]

You slide into the bucket with hardly a splash. (Footsteps approach.) You are silent. The water in the bucket is not water. The smell of inedible mop liquid makes you uneasy. (Footsteps pass.) You are silent. (Footsteps fade into the distance.) [[Keep exploring|Hide to Exploring]] [[Ambush the next being to mop|Bucket Ambush 1]]

Grabbing the mop in your beak, you pull the bucket over. Then you keep running. The scent of inedible liquids fills the air. The light-beings' mopping water is strong. And very slippery apparently. You relish the sound of bodies thudding to the floor. The scramble of collision. You don't look back. [[hONK! hONK!|Planet 1]]

''Chapter 3: The Door'' You find yourself at the door once more. You still have no means to enter. A being approaches. (if: $IsMichael is 1)[The frilly one with the clicker! Their face radiates anger.] (if: $IsMichael is 0)[This one wears white frills and gold face-specks. Their face communicates mysterious recognition.] You lock eyes. They pull out their hand-screen. They say smug noises. But you are far more smug. The door did lights. The lights listened to the hand-screen. There's your answer. [[hONK! hONK! hONK!|Michael Fight]]

''Prologue'' The being in the black coat was different. They were not scared of you. They did not attack you. Also their foot-clothes were snakes. But this did not seem to matter. They appreciated you. They helped you cause mayhem. Even after you ran off with their ice cream. Even after you chased their mate around a park bench. [[honk|Prologue 2]]

The ground on the roof is mostly gravel. You see several plants in orange stone containers. You see several tacky statues. You see an interesting hut. An enormous white tilted bowl is staked to the roof. The hut is surely occupied. [[Throw rocks into the dish|Rocks]] [[Tip over a statue|Statue]] [[Knock a plant off the building|Plant]]

You give an experimental peck at a bit of blue. It's wet. It's extremely cold. It tastes intensely of delicious fish. The ball warps where you pecked. Ripples spread slowly outward. Puffs of white haze swirl. You're about to peck again, but footsteps alert you. [[hONK?|Planet Close]]

You hiss a few times to clear your throat, and... HONK! Puffs of white haze whoosh away. Wrinkles of blue flutter and warp. Some zipping, floating points of light careen into each other, glow brighter for a moment, and then fade to fast moving dust. Before you can feel too satisfied, the the footsteps have almost caught up. [[hONK?|Planet Close]]

You run at them. They brandish white wings. Unfazed, you brandish your own white wings. The flurry of feathers is brief, but decisive. The hand screen is yours. The door is open. You are inside. The door rejects the being without a hand screen. The door is closed once again. [[honk?|Interlude 2017]]

The room is dark. No...the room is dim. After the enveloping brightness everywhere else, your eyes slowly adjust. You're in what appears to be a movie theater. You waddle down the aisle. You reach where the movie would be. But there's no movie. Just a circle of glowing blue shapes on the floor. And a curtain off to the side. [[hONK!|Door 2]]

The beings are almost there. It's not hard to evade them. They're running for the ball. They're all very distressed. They don't seem interested in you anymore. Seeing your chance, you leave. A being is running toward the others with a mop. You honk, and they squeak and dodge away from you. [[This is your chance to finally explore the door|Michael Interlude]]

You pick up a small rock. You flap your wings. You toss it into the dish. You pick up a bigger rock. You flap your wings. You toss it into the dish. It tilts slightly. This causes a disturbance. You feel a rumble in your chest. You feel a high pitched whine at the edge of your hearing range. The door opens. A being begins to climb toward the dish. It is easy to maneuver around them. [[Enter the hut|Hut]]

The statue is tall and gray. It has wings like you do. Yours are nicer, you think to yourself. You fly up to get a closer look. Stone wings can't fly, you think to yourself. You plant both feet firmly on its useless wings. You flap. And push. And with a terrific crash, it crumbles into gravel. The door opens. The being cries out in distress. You duck behind them. [[Enter the hut|Hut]]

You push over a plant. It falls into clouds. You wait for a sound. There is none. You push over a second plant. The first plant hasn't made a sound yet. You wait. Neither plant makes a sound. You push over a third plant. You squint at the dense clouds. The door opens. One of the plants must have finally hit something! The being runs to secure the remaining plants from the unknown force. You've hidden behind the statue. [[Enter the hut|Hut]]

The most interesting thing in the hut is a large screen. You watch two beings in strange clothing. You regognize your park! You recognize Snake Feet's voice! They stare suspiciously at the pond with their mirror eyes. They murmur suspiciously to their mate. Several ducks swim away indignantly. But another being has entered. They're carrying a mop. All it takes is a honk, and they scurry out again. But it is time to leave. The being does not chase you down the stairway. [[This is your chance to finally explore the door|Michael Interlude]]

honk... The bright loudness to your voice is gone. Now you sound smothered and diminished. Your eyes have adjusted enough to see a curtain off to the side. [[Pull the curtain down|Door 3]]

The curtain cascades to the ground. You see a tall noise-table. Attatched to the top is a noise-recepticle. With a few flaps, you've landed on top of the noise-table. [[Press the largest button|Door 4]]

Gold instruments descend from the ceiling. They honk parade music. Amused, you sing along. The floor shapes glow brighter. A floating face made out of light appears. It smiles slightly but is otherwise still. [[Honk into the recepticle|Door 5]]

You speak into the noise recepticle. HONKKKK. The head-being honks exactly at the same time as you do. Their voice drowns out yours. [[Honk|Door6]]

HONKKKK. The door opens. Many beings are arriving. They surely see you. They do not approach. They are looking at the head-being in shock. [[Honk|Door7]]

HONKKKK. The beings are very distressed. More beings are arriving. Some speak angry noises. Some have violent arms. Some have giant knives that erupt in flame. [[Honk|Door8]]

HONKKKK. Too many beings are arriving. The noises are becoming louder. Sadness. Anger. Fear. Violence. The mass of beings begins to scatter. [[Honk|Door9]]

HONKKKK. Only one being is left besides the giant face. The stern gray one. Their coat still has faint beverage stains. They speak a command noise. [[Exit the room|Fire intro]] [[Honk|Door 9.5]]

HONKKKK. The Gray One walks up to your noise table. They speak the command noise again. The face-being speaks the noise with them. The Gray One is not alarmed by the face being. They press a button and the mask of light and sound flickers away. [[Exit the room|Fire intro]] [[Honk|Door 9.6]]

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''Chapter 4: Fire'' Time passes. The bag comes off. You're in a cage now. A tower of fire roars in front of you. You've seen fire before. This one is different. You don't quite understand how. [[hONK!|Fire 1]] (set: $IsSegway to 0)

A bag is thrown over your head. Another being has snuck up behind you. [[Honkph!!|Fire intro]]

The beings find you again. It doesn't take long. Probably because you keep hONKING! It's just TOO satisfying. All this open space! All the bright noises you can make! [[hONK! hONK! hONK! hONK! hONK!|Planet 1]]

You come across a door. It is propped open by a second bucket. [[Go inside|Supply Closet 1]] [[Return to the staircase|Earth Observation 1]] [[Return to the open area|Exploring To Planet]]

You lie in wait. The not-water irritates you. The smell is not easy to withstand. You think of the payoff. You keep waiting. You do not have to wait long. This pristine place is full of light and emptiness. There is no room for an unsightly mop bucket. Soon, a being arrives to put it out of sight. [[Keep waiting|Bucket Ambush Journey]] [[hONK!|Bucket Ambush Spring]]

Your world sways as the Mopping Being carries the bucket. Still you wait. If they notice the extra weight, they don't indicate suspicion. Then they stop. Keys jingle. You wait. Just long enough for them to complete the hard part. A door creaks open. (set: $IsKey to 1) [[hONK! hONK! hONK!|Bucket Ambush Spring]]

hONK! You spring from the bucket in a flurry of beating wings, showering the Mopping Being in a shower of droplets and feathers. They make a delightful squak of panic. Then the mop handle hits them in the face. They try to run but slip on the rapidly spreading puddle of not-water. They finally scramble to their feet and the bright loudness of their panic squaks sings all around you until they're out of sight. (if: $IsKey is 1)[[[hONK!|Supply Closet 1]]] (if: $IsKey is 0)[[[hONK!|Exploring]]]

The beings are nowhere in sight. You have time to do this artfully. [[Push it over. Slowly|Push Bucket]] [[Drop it from a height|Fly Bucket]]

First you yank out the mop. A wave of droplets and bubbles arcs from the cords. The mop clatters and spins across the floor. A smear of liquid follows it. Now for the bucket itself. You beat your wings. You hover for a moment, contemplating. With both feet, you kick the bucket. Gently. Just a nudge. The not-water ripples You beat your wings again. This kick is ever so slightly stronger. The bucket tips, teeters, hovers... Water swirls. And slowly, it falls. Pale blue liquid pools across the floor, rapidly spreading, tiny bubbles speckling the surface. [[Splash]] [[hONK!|Exploring]]

Your beak darts out and closes around the handle. Your wings beat. You and the handle are airborne. With a few more powerful beats of your wings and a few strained hONKS, the bucket lifts off the ground. Not very far. Just enough to unbalance the mop handle. Slowly it falls. Like a tree or telephone pole. The edge of the bucket follows. Finally the head of the handle clatters to the ground. Water starts to surge out of the bucket. With a final hONK, you're able to fly the bucket higher, and the mop flips it over entirely, sending water splashing in all directions. [[Splash]] [[hONK!|Exploring]]

You study the mess on the floor. The deepest puddle is...there! Your wings come out again. A few flaps, and a leap, and-- SPLASH! Your feet hit the surface at the same time. Cascading droplets, bubbles, ripples...it's a work of art. With your wings and feet, you make short work of the rest of the not-water until there's no longer any amount of it deep enough to make a satisfying splash. [[hONK!|Exploring]]

''Gabriel and the Dire Duck'' A Good Omens / Untitled Goose Game crossover Inspired by a comic by Moonplata: https://moonplata.tumblr.com/post/188111235369/oh-no [[Begin|Prologue 1]]

''//Interlude, 1905//'' // "You almost got yourself hit by a trolley, Angel!" Crowley was carefully checking him for injuries. "Wouldn't have even stopped the thing." "I had to try something," Aziraphale insisted. He got to his feet and helped Crowley up too. "The brakes failed, and...and there were people in both crosswalks! I should have miracled the whole thing away like you did I suppose, but there was just...no time to think." "At least I can't get in trouble with my lot, right?" Crowley smirked, desperately diverting the subject. "Not when I stopped an angel from doing something Heavenly." "It was the right thing to do, but it wasn't 'Heavenly' at all, really." Aziraphale retorted, suddenly bitter. "Gabriel would have just miracled the tracks, so it hit the less crowded crosswalk and then tried to cite the greater good." Crowley wanted to put a hand on his shoulder. (That's because you're better than them!) Instead, he shot a final nervous glance behind him, and they went off to lunch. // // [[Continue|Best Confrontation]]

A protective barrier is descending. Beings are fleeing toward it. One falls behind. Their leg must have been burned earlier. Or maybe they were one of the ones where you accidentally honked and bit at the same time. They stumble and scramble and crawl and cry out. By the time you reach the barrier, only two beings remain. The Mopping Being stands over the hurt one. You would have recognized them without the mop, but they have that too. They shake with fear but point the handle at you. Silly being. Their weapon is just as flammable as they are! [[Lower your head and charge|Worst Interlude]] [[Let them escape|Best Interlude]]

''//Interlude, 2010//'' // "This place could realy use a gardner," Aziraphale muttered. "Mph." Crowley spat out a leaf, adjusted his stance on Aziraphale's shoulders, carefully drew himself to his full height, and peeked through the window. "...And a nanny. Kid's painting an entire masterpiece on that antique sideboard, and nobody's noticed yet." "Shouldn't be a problem to...requisition the proper disguises," "And they'll wot? SHIP it to you?" "Of course. Heaven prides itself on our rigorous postal contractors." "Lucky." Crowley was watching Warlock gnaw on the dog's tail, trying to figure out if it was out of affection or malice. "My lot hasn't had a proper delivery service since the fourteenth century." // [[Continue|Prologue 8]]

Swing a flaming sword around

Also honk a request and a random picture prints. from earth observation random database of funny stuff. Get a couple chances.

Beings scatter before you, making distressed noises. You have caused delicious mayhem. You have defeated the Gray One's mysterious face. You have even set several glorious fires. [[Chase down the beings as they flee.|Rampage More]] [[Find the brown package area and the way home.|Best Epilogue]]

They throw you in. Flames engulf you. But you don't burn. You are a demon. Deep down, this is something you've always known. [[hONK fIIIIRE!|Interlude, 1827]]

''//Interlude, 2017//'' // "YOU have a smartphone?" Crowley's incredulous tone was tempered by warmth and a dumbfounded smile. Aziraphale returned the smile, if a bit nervously. "I prefer to consider it as Heaven's smartphone," he explained. Crowley's smile only grew, and he shook his head. "...I'm really only required to have it with me while I'm reporting to Head Office..." Aziraphale continued when Crowley didn't challenge him. "...I don't even know how to work most of the features properly! I really only ever use it for proximity access authorization! It...it stays in my cubby whenever I'm on Earth and--" Crowley could see he was getting uncomfortable, so he changed the subject. "You have a CUBBY? Do you put your lunch there too?" Aziraphale beamed. "As a matter of fact, yes! I'm not the only angel who occasionally enjoys..." // [[Continue|Door 1]]

The beings clutch at each other and stagger back. Mortal peril is in their eyes. [[hONK fIRE!|Rampage 2]]

Time slows. [[hONKHONKHONK!|Supply Closet 4]]

You do not remember how many you have eaten. You only remember your newfound strength. [[hONKHONKHONK!|Supply Closet 5]]

Ruined boxes pile up. Some boxes contain smaller cups of sweet milk. You devour this too. [[hONKHONKHONK!|Supply Closet 6]]

You turn your awe inspiring destructive energy to the rest of the closet. (Choose a weapon!) [[Markers]] [[Scissors]]

You draw the rudest, most inappropriate thing you can think of. A long, squiggly, coiled line. On every surface available. The appliances. The paper. The walls. The beings who run in to stop you. The walls as you dodge them and run out the door. Everything you can reach as you lead them on a frantic chase. The being with the mop even ends up with a squiggly line on their face. But then the markers finally run out. Hissing your distaste, you spit out the last marker and return to the closet, only to find the door locked again. [[Investigate the mysterious door at last|Michael Interlude]]

You brandish the twin knives and sink them into the nearest box. Next is the beverage appliances. Then...it blends together. Paper. Markers. Jugs of not-water. You see red as all matter succumbs to your destructive will. The beings who come to stop you shriek and dodge away just in time. You pursue them and find the door locked behind you. You brandish the knives until they finally flee. One even drops their mop and makes funny squeaking noises. [[Investigate the mysterious door at last|Michael Interlude]]

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You try to honk again, but the Gray One catches your beak and holds it closed. The noises they make are intense, and spoken directly to your face. Then they bare their teeth at you. With other geese, it means aggression. With beings, it means joy. With the Grey One...you think it's both. [[hONK!|Fire Last]] [[Hate-smile|Fire Last]] [[Stare|Fire Last]]

Gray One's noises stumble. He stares at you. You stare back. Gray One starts to make noises again. [[hONK!|Fire 3]]

A being addresses you. It's the Gray One, of course. Behind them, you see Frilly One and Knife Teeth. Gray one is ''still'' addressing you. [[hONK!|Fire 2]]

Gray One's noies trip but then only grow louder and angrier. [[hONK hONK hONK hONK HONK HONK HONKHONK!|Fire 4]]

Gray One has trailed off. They breathe loudly at you. [[hOnk!|Fire 5]]

''//Interlude, 1905//'' // "Angel, what on Earth did you go and get yourself hit by a trolley for?" Crowley was carefully checking his injuries. Okay nothing too serious. Breathe. BREATHE. "Wouldn't have even stopped the thing if I hadn't miracled it away." "I had to try something," Aziraphale insisted "The brakes failed, and...and there were people in both crosswalks! There was just...no time to think." "At least I can't get in trouble with my lot, right?" Crowley desperately diverted the subject. "Not when I tried to stop an angel from doing something Heavenly." He forced a smile. "It was the right thing to do, but it was hardly 'Heavenly,'" Aziraphale spat, mimicking Crowley's emphasis on the final word. "Gabriel would have miracled the tracks, so it hit the less crowded crosswalk. Then when I objected, he'd have lectured me about the greater good." Crowley put a hand on his good shoulder. "Aziraphale, you're better than ten Gabriels!" ...was what he wanted to say. And then a great deal more than that. Instead he finally went with, "Can you sit up? I'm going to try to get you home." // [[Continue|Worst Confrontation]]

You emerge from the demon flames. Your hONK sends flames shooting even closer to their heels. They trip over each other in their haste to flee. Knife Teeth is pushed to the ground. You beat your wings and tip over the column. It lands dangerously close, and they're almost engulfed. They are the last to leave your presence. In the distance, several beings stand on wheeled vehicles. [[Chase down a vehicle|Segway]] [[Find the beings' nests|Closets]] [[Waddle forth with no objective beyond mayhem|Choir]]

You thought the world went white before. Now it truly has. "I think that's quite enough now, don't you?" The noises you hear sound like the other beings, but beyond all explanation, you can understand them. [[Honk.|Worst Confrontation 2]]

You thought the world went white before. Now it truly has. "You've certainly had an interesting day, haven't you, my friend?" The noises you hear sound like the other beings, but beyond all explanation, you can understand them. [[Honk.|Best Confrontation 2]]

"I know you're confused, but fear not. I will take you back home where you belong." [[Honk?|Best Epilogue]]

This area is spectacular! Arrays of pale clothing stretch as far as you can see. [[hONK fIRE!|Closets Fire]] [[peck and tear|Closets Peck]]

You wander off. Perhaps there are still beings that haven't fled from you yet. There is a strange singing in the distance. You follow the sound of the music. It is cheery, but repetitive. Seven lines gain steadily in pitch, only for the eighth to send the melody back down to the beginning. The specific articulations even sound the same. It needs to stop! The singing beings haven't seen you yet. You approach the box that is making the music. [[Play the music device backward|Choir Demons]] [[Set it on fire and rush the choir|Choir Fire]]

With a few firey beats of your wing, you divert them. They were standing by a box on the wall. It is red with glass in the middle. Inside the box is a pitcher. Instinct tells you this must be destroyed--but cautiously. [[Use the implement on a chain|Pitcher 1.5]] (if: $IsSegway is 1)[[[Use the vehicle|Pitcher 1.6]]]

tap Tap. The glass cracks. You focus your efforts and watch the beautiful tendrils of entropy creep outward. tap tap TAP. One precise strike, and the pane crumbles at your feet. That was the easy part. You study the pitcher and CAREFULLLY take it in your feet. You don't drop it until you're fairly high in the air. A wave of cold air engulfs you when it breaks. That was too close. [[Assess the fleeing beings|Rampage Dwindling]]

You slow your approach. You time it just right. Then...now! Leaning back, you kick the vehicle upward toward the box at just the right angle. Then you turn and fly for your life. The sound of several kinds of breaking glass rings out at once. You fly faster. You feel a strange chill behind you. Then the sound of a distant gentle splash. You keep flying. [[hONK!|Rampage Dwindling]]

The clothes burn beautifully. Jackets. Foot clothes. You spot familiar gray. You scream your revenge into softt coats and scarves. Refreshed, you waddle back to see where everyone ran off to. But then you spot a cluster of them conspiring. [[hONK hONK??|Pitcher]]

You bite and peck experimentally to see what rips. You find special joy in smouldering and then tearing. Your favorite is an entire shelf of familiar gray scarves. It is easy to tear off a piece narrow enough to wind comfortably around your neck. You waddle back to show off the charred edges of your new favorite fashion accessory to the other beings, especially the Gray One. But then you spot a cluster of them conspiring. [[hONK hONK??|Pitcher]]

hONK! hONK! Puffs of fire shoot from your beak. The distressed noises are shrill. Beings collide with each other. You approach a denser crowd, looking for heels to nip. [[hONK!|Rampage Final]]

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"I know you're confused, but fear not. Soon you'll be where you belong." [[Honk?|Worst Epilogue]]

It is a lovely morning in the big city, and you are a horrible goose. In the distance you hear sirens. An oddly-dressed being skateboards down the street, collides with a moving car, yanks the door open, hauls the driver out at gunpoint, and careens down the road, driving very badly. Probably nothing to worry about, you think. //Fin//

It is a lovely morning in the park, and you are a horrible goose. Snake Feet and their mate bring you the most delicious seeds and greens you've ever tasted. Your adventures give you the kind of imposing fearlessness necessary to chase even the fiercest dogs and send them running. One day, you even think you spot Gray One. They don't meet your gaze. Fin

''//Interlude 2019//'' // "

You chase beings. You spin circles around them and watch in glee as they shrink away from the flames that surround them. You ride wide arcs across the entire open area trying to see how fast this thing can go. But then you spot a cluster of them conspiring. [[hONK hONK??|Pitcher]]

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You press a few buttons on the music device. You don't know what they do, but you expect one ought to play the module in the opposite direction, and it does. The noise turns dark. Sinister voices speak sinister noises which even the beings do not seem to understand. But they understand demon fire and beating wings. [[hONK hONK hONK!|Choir Chase]]

You pick up the device. The music fizzles and corrupts as the device burns. You beat your flaming wings and honk. You brandish the music at the beings. Their voices fizzle and corrupt as they scatter in fright. [[hONK!|Choir Chase]]

You chase the beings all the way back to the others. You are mildly disappointed that their voices don't sing a theme song. When you return, you spot a cluster of beings conspiring. [[hONK hONK??|Pitcher]]